We're Baaaccck!

Hello friends and well-wishers of the wonderful Jowder's Blog! It's been quite some time since we've all seen eachother, has it not? Well, we all returned from Spring Break triumphantly, some of us with less bruises than others.
A lot has happened since the last time we all spoke: We had our first party since spring break and it was a total success! I say it was a success because not many people showed up, not many people had fun-- but I did! So, it was a success!
So what is going on over here? Well, a bunch of us totally helped write the end of the show, so I guess that's pretty great. Also, Dan is trying to purchase games for the Virtual Console, but he doesn't realize that to buy games on Virtual Console you first have to buy Alex Super Mario RPG for the Virtual Console, otherwise it won't let you buy anything else on it. He'll learn someday. Also: Dan, Cait, Pete and I are testing our endurance by staying on the Beyonce Lemon Detox Diet. So far Dan has dropped out. Already. Within two hours of trying it he flipped out and made himself twenty-seven burgers. Twenty-seven.
Again, the Wii has failed because Dan doesn't realize that he needs to buy Super Mario RPG. He's an idiot.
I s'pose that's it for now. I just wanted to make a small blog post.

My 21st!

Hey.
It's my 21st Birthday.
I typed 31st at first.
But that's wrong.
My friends took me to a place called Tracks in Stamford.
It was fun.
I'm crazy drunk.
I miss Jowders.
I miss you all. <3.
Hey, what's going on over here?

Who watches the technical director presentations?

Cait's turn!

Today's TD was fan-fucking-tastic. First of all, he was bright blue. BRIGHT ELECTRIC BLUE. Normally I'd think that a blue man would be pretty weird, but my LORD he had a giant penis. GIANT. Perhaps I should have mentioned that he was naked. It's not like he just whipped out(not that I'd have a problem with that), he just doesn't see the point in wearing clothes. He once showed up for a televised interview about the impending holocaust wearing nothing but eyeliner. He's my kind of name.

His name is John Ostermann, and he had originally intended on being a watchmaker, but after the destruction of Hiroshima he left the field to pursue physics. He used to be a nuclear scientist, but a terrible accident turned him into a lighting designer. He had left his watch inside of an Intrinsic Field subtractor, and when he went back to retrieve it the timelock, well, locked, and he was trapped inside. The accident gave him superpowers, and he was later contracted by the government to fight in the Vietnam war.

Lucky for us, he left the title of goverment-sactioned superhero behind him after a self-exile on Mars, and now he's applying for the TD position at Franklin Pierce. I thoroughly enjoyed his presentation.

And by presentation, I mean giant blue penis.

Dan and the Magic Bush!

So after I drew my picture of Drowasfdak I gave Chad the notebook and pencil and this is what he drew... 

All we know is that the man is Dan but the rest of the scenario is unknown. Here is what I think:

One day Dan woke up and slid on his suit jacket, glued his hair up, and went about his day. On his way to school he saw cleavage peering at him in through the bushes. Dan was intrigued and got into his pouncing stance. He then made his move but before he could dive in it attacked! A pair of breastes on squiggle-bob fremped out at him! I am unsure about what happened next but I'm sure he woke up naked inside of the info desk.

Thank you.

(If you have any idea what it means comment below or repost!)

What Really Happened: The Alex Story

That bitch didn't even do a presentation.
I give her 3 out of 5 Courtneys

TD Review: Part Deux

So I didn't get much sleep last night so I decided not to attend the second of the pretend classes but luckily I have Alex to describe to me about this second candidate. So this TD was a woman named... Amy Donkrway.... She wore a denim skirt and a sweater. She liked lighting stuff I think he said and that she was nervous for most of the beginning. Her presentation I assume was a slide show of drawings from the time that she did The Glass Menagerie. I would of been impressed with her but she didn't mention anything about sound. Not that I really care but it would of been nice to mention... 

I give her 2 1/2 Courtneys out of 5!

Hull: 2059

Tonight was the wackiest adventure of my entire life.
It started with Luke innocently asking me if I would accompany him on his trip to bring Christie back to Hull. I said yes.
I should have said no.
We started our drive around 7:00 PM March 8th, 2009.
I mention the year because the trip we were about to take was through time.
We traveled along Route 59 for about 20 minutes. I had never heard of a Route 59 around these parts before, so I asked Luke where we were exactly; he stayed quiet. I began to get nervous. A thick blackness blanketed the sky. There were no streetlights, no stars-- no moon. There were no other cars on this route. It was one way. There were no trees in sight. A dense fog rolled in. It was impossible to see anything even an inch in front of my face. I started shouting to Luke that he should slow down. "Slow down," I shouted, "We'll crash! Luke!" I screamed until I was hoarse, but could not hear my own voice. The fog had seeped into the car. I could not see my own hands. I felt reality slipping away from me. I don't know if I passed out because I was terrified, or if I had drowned in the dense fog.
I woke up after what seemed like five minutes. The clock said it was 8:30. I had lost an hour and a half. Luke and Christie stood above me when everything came back into focus. Christie was laughing loudly. Luke slapped me in the face. "Get up, "He said, "We're here." Luke told me we were in Hull. Behind us was a giant fence. Ahead of us was a lush, green wonderland. The sun was shining. This was my first sign.
Looming above the town were a giant pair of glasses. They made a complete 360 every couple of seconds, as if they were scanning the town.
Christie grabbed my arm. "You hungry?"
"I-I guess so?" My voice was hoarse. I assumed it was from the screaming earlier. They took me to a local restaurant. It was called Starz. They told me it was a diner. We sat in a booth. It was a strangely themed diner. The theme seemed to be cheetah cubs? The waitress, who wore a familiar pair of glasses brought us our menus. "My name is Leena. Boh-God." My eyes bulged. Did our waitress just say boh-god? Luke and Christie both responded with a casual "Boh-God."
"I'll be your waitress tonight, so uh...if you uhhh, need me or anything-- I'll be here." She sauntered away, and sat on stool staring at us. Her eyes made me uneasy. I looked down at the menu. The options were limitted: Ellios, Chicken Nuggest and French Fries and Cheese Raviollis. I looked up at Luke and he said nothing.
We ate in silence.
We left for our first landmark: Luke's house.
What stood before us was not a house. What stood before us was a monument. A monument of a tall, slender man with an eye-patch. His face was familiar to me, yet somehow distant. I looked to Luke and looked back at the statue. He nudged me forward. I took a few steps toward the monument. I saw in the man's hand an enormous staff. Nestled in the staff's head was a massive dark crystal, pulsing with energy. I took a few more steps and read the inscription written on the monument's base:
"Speak softly and carry a big stick."
It was then I realized I was no longer in my own time.
My nose began to bleed, and my headed pounded. The last thing I heard was Christie laughing loudly.
I woke up again in Luke's car. We were on Route 3 North. We were in Boston. It was 10:30. He turned to me and smiled. We drove in silence.